Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
