summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
