i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
