Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize