you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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