i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
