I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
