No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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