No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
