Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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