i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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