they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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