i just wanna soil my oats bro
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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