I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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