Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
