She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
