we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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