Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
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