Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
