Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize