He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We don't watch enough power rangers
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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