end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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