How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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