Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Randomize
