So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize
