I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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