Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
