Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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