so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
