BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Boobs are out for the taking
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
