I want to stick my p in your. b.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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