That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
