the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
