i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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