i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
