Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
