if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
