So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize