Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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