Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
