I wanna passion pit in your ass
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize