ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
