omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
sex in a hospital.. check
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
