You're a womanizer and a bitch.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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