you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Randomize
