I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
