Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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