My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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