Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
