im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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