cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
